Let’s face it; anal play is not for everyone. Part of the problem is that there are still a lot of rumors, mis-truths and hang-ups involved when it comes to contact with the anal area.
So why do some people still consider anal play to be taboo? Maybe it is down to the fact that we have been taught that anything in that area of our body is ‘dirty’ in some way, but as long as normal hygiene rules are applied, then anal play is perfectly clean and safe to enjoy.
- The key to getting a woman to enjoy anal play is never to be rushed, and never to force anything. Try inserting a well-lubed finger, (only up to the first knuckle,) when you are giving her oral sex. Women are often more receptive to the idea of anal play if their mind is on something pleasurable such as oral sex, when it first occurs.
- You will be able to tell from her reaction whether she is receptive to the idea of anal play or not, so watch out for her unspoken signals. Women don’t always say what they feel, so these unspoken signals are extremely important. If she flinches or pulls away, then stop immediately.
- Lubrication is of paramount importance when you are considering anal play as it will make things a lot more comfortable. The anus has two bands of strong muscle around the outside edges, known as sphincters and it is these that you need to get past. We can control one of them with conscious thought and the other is controlled automatically, and lubrication and being slow and gentle with your movements are the two best ways of gaining entrance to the anus for anal play.
- Try and remember that slow and steady wins the race, so if she does not appear to be in the mood for anal play this time, then wait a few weeks and try again. Always start with a finger, and then work your way up over a period of time, before you even think about anal intercourse.
- Sometimes using a clitoral vibrator helps make anal play even more enjoyable for women. The stimulation of the clit combined with anal stimulation can really amplify the intensity of her orgasm. It can also help relax the muscles, which can help with anal penetration.
- Communication is of huge importance in any aspect of your relationship and this was never truer than when trying something new, such as anal play. Always be prepared to talk things through and learn about what her misgivings may be. As previously mentioned there are still a lot of myths surrounding the idea of anal play and so if you talk about things, and maybe do a little research, you should be able to lay any fears to rest.