My cart

Close

A Beginner’s Guide to Bondage

Most people have given some thought to the idea of being restrained during lovemaking; how does it feel, do your other senses take over, is it scary? These and many other questions will no doubt be running through your mind, and if you have read the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy, then the chances are that you are now ready to start exploring this new world which has been put before you.

The very first thing you should understand is that Fifty Shades of Grey does not represent a true BDSM relationship, and that BDSM is a very different ball game to trying out some bondage ideas for the first time. In a future post, I will go more into how BDSM and bondage differ, but just for now we will take a look at the lighter side of this new world, which is bondage.

If you are going to try this for the first time, then I would still suggest that you speak to your partner about it before you do. You might find the idea of being ‘in bondage’ a thrill, but what about your partner? What would you do if they were horrified by the idea? One man’s meat is another man’s poison and all that! This is why you really need to talk about how far you would like to go and what is acceptable behavior to both of you.

Don’t tell him exactly what day it is going to happen and that way it will still be a surprise for him. Arrange a nice meal for when he gets in from work and make sure you have set the scene in the bedroom before he gets there.

Lead him through to the bedroom, telling him you are going to have dessert in there…his mind will be running riot with the possibilities that spring into his mind.

Along with bondage goes the idea of ‘punishment’ of some kind, which usually would be a little light spanking to begin with, until you both know whether you want to push your boundaries a little further. You could buy some handcuffs to start, or just use dressing gown cords or scarves to attach his wrists to the bed, and maybe tie a scarf around his eyes so he doesn’t know what to expect next. Have fun! You can ger a game, like the Fifty Days of Play game that helps lead you through some scenarios in a fun way. Or, play how you think you would both be turned on.

If you enjoy this first foray into bondage, read some of our other bondage blog posts to learn how you can step the action up a little, and we will also discuss creating a safe environment for both of you where you will be able to further experiment without the need for being scared.

Subscribe to the Nakees blog RSS feed.

Trail a feather down his back and then alternate that with some light spanking to his butt with the flat of your hand or even a little paddle. Stay away from his tailbone as that can cause injury. Use your other hand to pleasure him at the same time and he will be torn between the whole pleasure/pain principle.