It’s quite a daunting prospect to walk into a swinger’s party for the first time. The chances are that, apart from your partner, you might not know anyone else who is going to be there. There will be all sorts of feelings running through your head and you will no doubt be wondering just what the others who attend will be “into”. Just remember that everyone who attends the swinger’s party could be in the same position as you and it could be their first time too.
So try not to be too nervous; after all one of the reasons for going to a swinger’s party is because you want to see and experience new things. Don’t feel that you will be pressurized into trying anything or that someone is just going to grab you and make you do anything you don't want to do. There is a lot of etiquette to observe at swinger’s parties, including the fact that permission is needed from every participant before anything is allowed to happen.
Swinger’s parties are often held in private homes and when you go to the party, it is good manners to turn up with a gift for the host. If you drink alcohol then make sure to take your own and maybe a plate of nibbles or finger food and a bottle of wine for the host. You will be far more warmly received if you show that you are a thoughtful person, and more likely to be asked to return for their next swinging party. It’s also considered to be good manners if you offer help to the host when it comes to the clearing up afterward.
Another thing to bear in mind is that it’s not the best of manners to stand and stare at what someone else may be getting up to, unless they indicate that it’s okay to do so. And do not just assume that you can join in with someone else’s threesome, (or however many are participating,) ask permission first.
It may be that you attend a swinging party at a club or public venue, but you need to bear in mind that at some clubs actual sexual activity is not allowed and would need to be done off the premises. There will also be a door fee to pay when you go to a public venue and this can vary widely. For example, a single male may be asked to pay something like $50, whereas a couple would only pay around $20. This is obviously intended to discourage single males from attending, just in the hope of getting some no-strings sex, as that is not what the true ethos of being a swinger is all about.
Agreeing to attend a swinging party means that you are agreeing to have an open sexual relationship, with no need to tell any lies and so you need to mentally prepare yourself for how it might feel to see your partner having sex with someone else. So think carefully before you agree; if you can’t stand the heat, get out of the kitchen!
Read our other posts about the Swingers' lifestyle.